For everything there is a season...
Have you ever felt so close to God, you know he is trying to show you something, but at the same time so far from Him, sure he is not hearing a word you are praying? That is the best way I know how to describe what I feel right now. So many feeling I just do not know what to do with all of them....I am praising God as I am reminded of all I owe him for all he has done in my life, my life would be so different without him. I am reminded of his grace and mercy extended to me even though I am a sinner and am constantly messing up. I am reminded of his uncoditional love for me, his daughter...and yet I feel so unworthy, as I see those around me who I am so close to and love that have not accepted the gift of his son. I am burdened because those around me do not know the Lord and the life he can give them. I often wonder...why me?...Why am I not the lost person who is searching for truth in everything except the Lord: Guys, money, drugs, career? I could very well be that person, if it were not for the Lord and all he has done and continues to do. As I am reminded that it is only because of the grace of God that I am where I am today...my heart cries out for those who do not know him. My prayer...that myself and other believers would live a life that would point people to Christ. There is so much more I want to say...but I cannot put it into words just yet. I am looking forwatd to this week ahead, as I have time off to rest and pray and think...and just be silent. If you know me, you know silence is not something that comes easily for me...but this week I hope to just spend time in silence with the Lord.